UGH!!!

I am starting to realize that I get very irritated when people don't take their health seriously, but pretend like they do. If you are sick and know what you should be doing and choose not to do it, don't tell me. It makes me not even WANT to help you. To be honest I'm like that on everything. If you ask for my help and don't do what I suggest, then please stop asking. I am going through my own issues with eating and getting healthy. I'm tired of being overweight, out of shape, and clogged up. If you aren't then that is just fine with me, but just know that I won't beg you to do better. I won't continue to try and teach you if you don't want to learn.

I...WANT...TO...LIVE!!!

I don't want to die from preventable diseases. I don't want to be the person in the casket that people look at my fat ass and lie saying, "Lawd, she was so young. I can't believe she died from *insert preventable disease of choice here*." I have heard that lie so many times and I am SO sick of it.

I watched Paula Dean today on that cooking show "The Chew". She sittin' up there crying and going on about having diabetes, giving up sweet tea, blah, blah, blah. Then she goes on to say that she has always preached moderation! WHEN?!?! THEN she said gave all these reasons that people can be diabetics, including race which is a steaming pile of bullshit, but conveniently left out diet. Really Paula? Really?

It's time for us to stop choosing to buy into these lies. There are so many people out here that are older than Paula Dean and super healthy because they have discipline! I'm trying to learn from them. I don't want to make anymore excuses. I'm not saying that I won't screw up, but I can say that I won't quit. I am back down to the size I was when I did the MC originally and I did it just by changing my diet and 3 days on the treadmill. I have messed up a few times, but I made up for it. My children WILL NOT bury me before my time. I owe it to them to stay around as long as possible and to slip peacefully to the other side.

Oh, btw, I ate a really good salad with hummus instead of dressing and it was better than I could have ever imagined!!! I'll try to remember to take a picture of it tomorrow...if I don't gobble it down again. That's something else I'm working on.

Master Cleanse?

Okay, so although I am doing better than I was (which isn't saying much) I think I need to suck it up and do MC. I really hate it, I must say. Well honestly what I hate is the constant sweet taste of the lemonade. I don't even bother with the salt water flush. If you checkout www.soulvegfolk.com you'll find a lovely post with a lot of input in the comments. I have used it as a jumping off point in the past and looks like that might just be my "thing". I've also been reading the Dick Gregory book and he is heavy on fasting so I feel hyped up for it.

I am noticing when I have combined foods incorrectly, and can't figure out how I never noticed this before. I'm sure I noticed, but I didn't realize that it wasn't normal. For example, I woke up all slim this morning...well slimmer. I put on my jeans and thought that maybe I'd worn them and hung them back up by mistake, but nope I've lost weight. I sashayed by my husband and he commented *shoulder back, chin up, extra hip sway* and I was really feeling myself. Then I ate lunch. I was SO good and by most people's judgement very healthy. Then for dessert about an hour or two later I made orange sorbet. Delish!!! Some time later I drank some prune juice. Okay, still doing well. Dinner before dark as per the Queen (Queen Afua). Apparently, the prune juice was still there and it mixed with the leftovers and...*burp, fart, bulch, burp, burp, faaaaarrrrt*. My stomach was literally getting bigger by the minute. I've gone from slim and sexy to suffering from Dunlap Syndrome. You know, when you belly dun lapped over your belt. I have to unbutton my formerly sexy jeans for the sake of my children. I mean, if a button pops they could be seriously injured!!! Thank GOD I put vinegar in my water, other wise this gas would set off the smoke alarm and the carbon monoxide detector. All I want at this point is an enema, but no! I can't do it because my husband is writing and is to be undisturbed. As I type this my major organs are being pushed out of position by gas building in my torso. If you don't see a post from me in the next couple of days, just know that I've exploded.

Please learn about food combinations...

Drum Roll Please!!!

Today is my first day. Here are my stats and they are pretty bad in my honest opinion.
Height:  5'2"
Weight: *Pre-colon flush-169.4 After flush 166.4
Chest:  39"
Waist:  37"
Hips:  43"
*Lemme explain the reason for doing two weights. I knew that I was constipated from all the meat, dairy, etc that I ate over the holidays. I have often read that people lose weight just from flushing their colons. I lost about 3lbs of waste this morning and although the pics don't look like it my stomach is not near as distended as it was. 


Anyway, here are the pictures...I must really love y'all and myself to be doing this...

My goal for this picture is to get rid of the 2nd chin. There should only be one chin per face and I have exceeded that limit. I would also like to see the love handles go. Why? Because fat on your torso is EXTREMELY dangerous and eventually deadly. 

Okay, this should be obvious. My freakin' chin is just ridiculously out of control.  Back fat and "mama arms" gotta go.  And the 4 months preggo look ain't cute since my children are 8 and 12. Sorry y'all that ain't a baby OR baby fat, and it shole ain't Baby Phat. lol

So far this morning I have had a ton of prune juice and am now working on drinking my powered Master Cleanse mix which my friend Mushirah was right about. It is NOT good. It really just tastes like I am drinking cayenne water. I am going to finish it because I bought it, but I must admit that I am disappointed about $20 worth. 

After going to the bathroom about 3lbs worth this morning, I've found that I am trying to talk myself out of the enema, but I think it has more to do with the unknown. I'm going to do it because I have let you all know what it's like. 

I haven't decided it I will allow myself a smoothie this evening or not. We'll see how everything goes. This will be a cleanse of listening to my body, so nothing is set is stone except the fact that we need to be able to be prune juice in bulk. Any ideas?

Btw, I don't know if I mentioned this before, but I cleanse with a group of women. LOVE THEM! I was thinking of asking them to guest blog to tell their experiences with cleansing. We'll see if they are interested. I hope so. 


Forgot to mention that the white stuff on my pants is cleaner. I am also cleaning my house along with the cleanse so that in the end I will have a cleanse body and a decluttered house. This is coming from the book by Queen Afua called "Heal Thyself". I am doing this in conjunction with an online group. 

Replacing MC with Raw Food Detox

I was sitting here sipping my "lemonade" and thinking about how the whole thing felt pointless. I didn't see a major difference the last time, but I didn't know what else to do. The other thing is that the point is to change my diet. Anyway, I talked to my husband about it he agreed that it was time for me to move forward from MC. I purchased the Lifeit 7 day detox packet and so far I am very pleased.

I broke my very short MC detox with a BEAUTIFUL salad. I made a dressing out of avocado, maple syrup, garlic, onion power, water, evoo, a lil salt, and a lil braggs. OMG!!! The dressing was sooooooo goooooood. My husband put it on the black bean burgers I made. BTW, this time I marinated some mushrooms in Bragg's Amino Acids before putting it in the bbb. I was eating the mushrooms while making the bbb because they were amazing...just wanted to put that out. I'm thinking that next time I might marinate and then dehydrate them. *wipes drool*

Anyway, just wanted to update you on the change.

The evening of the 1st day of MC 2011

Okay, so as you can tell from the vids I've been posting, I want to eat already. lol I've had a headache already, and in the spirit of transparency, yes I took something for it. Hell, I couldn't see. It was better for me take something than land in the emergency...again. I need to do this though. I really do. I can't wait to get started on the Lifeit Detox.

I am really excited about getting this vegan thing right finally. The main thing I need to focus on is planning and preparation. I totally messed up Sunday at Mama's house. I ate 2 plates of mac and cheese, broccoli casserole, white beans, string beans, sliced tomatoes, and bread. Oh, and I also ate some strawberry delight. Oh, and I also drank some Appletini before the prune juice before going to bed. lol

Now that we've had true confessions, let's move forward. So, I'm going to drink my prune juice before I go to bed again. I'll try to do it literally before I lady down in hopes that I don't have any interruptions in my sleep.

Master Cleanse Day 1-Spring 2011

So last night I ended my night with 8 oz of prune juice. I did have a lil scare last night, but it was nothing. lol

This morning I drank 8 more oz of prune juice. As soon as my stomach began to let me know that the prune juice was working, my son and hubby decided that they needed to use the bathroom. I decided that I would use the one in our bedroom because I knew my hubby would be moving faster as he had been up for a while already. Um, no. He decided to discuss the fact that I should've told our son to get out of the bathroom so I could use it. All I heard was blah, blah, blah, gurgle, gurgle, gurgle...I finally made it with no problem. That is the difference between the prune juice and salt water. There would have been NO waiting around with the salt water flush. NONE.

I have chosen to use lime to start with...

Let me back up. My intention was to start this yesterday, like I did, but I almost didn't do it because I didn't have time to go the Home Economist yesterday. So, I didn't get to get anything organic. :( Harris Teeter did have a bag of limes on sale and that is how I ended up doing lime juice first. These lil things did have any juice. I used a whole bag on a gallon of "lemonade". I'm going to have to go back out today and get the good stuff.

I bought some veggies for hubby since he claims he is going to go raw while I do MC. We'll see. I didn't buy a lot of stuff, but I bought stuff that could be either a burrito-type-of-thing or a salad-type-of-thing. The point is that I purchased things that he can make himself. We'll see how it goes.

Master Cleanse and a lil bit more...

So, I think I'm going to MC tomorrow. There will be some changes this time. I am going to start with prune juice tonight and in the morning. The reason? Because I don't have time to get the tea and prune juice works better imho. I have a client in the morning and will be starting the prune juice early enough to "get it all out" before starting her hair. I will do the "lemon" as directed. I will be doing it for a minimum of 10 days as usual.

After completing my 10 days on MC, I will go raw for a minimum of 7 days with the Lifeit Detox. To be honest idk what I will do after that. My goal is to go vegan. This time of the year makes it a lot easier. I do, however, have to plan ahead for winter because that is when I have strong cravings for dairy and starch as my comfort food.

Another goal of mine is to back off the starches. The only way to rid myself of this belly is to lessen my intake of starch. I have noticed when I take this step, I don't really lose weight, but my stomach is flatter. Trying to keep from looking and feeling like this again.

 I wanna get back to looking and feeling like this...

These pics came from this post.

Well then, Master Cleanse it is!

So I've been battling a headache all day. I've been using white willow bark and it's taking the edge off, but it's not quite doing the job. Every year my body let's me know when spring is on it's way by my headaches making their way back. When I did MC for the first time it was because of the headaches and the headaches have been the reason for my decision to MC each year. As you know did the remedy instead, this is a clear sign that it didn't do the job quite like good ol' MC. I'm also REALLY tired and can't seem to get enough rest. UGH!

Summer solstice is on my birthday and I usually try no to cleanse on my birthday. I might just end up cleansing early, because I can't have too many more days like this. I've had a lot going on right now and a cleanse will probably do me a lot of good on both a spiritual and physical level.

Remedy-Day 4

I know I was slack because I usually write earlier in the day. I've been busy with errands and such. So, I've had lots of energy today, but I think it's more because this cleanse is almost over. I'm mostly finishing because I like to finish things I start. Here are conclusions I've come to while doing this cleanse:

This is not for someone who has cleansed regularly or already eats a relatively healthy diet. We were already vegetarian. We already drank chlorophyll daily. We'd already stopped eating out a lot. Blah, blah, blah...That being said, I didn't see any profound change. This would be an excellent starter cleanse. I will however incorporate all of the things I've learned and build on what we already have established healthwise. At a later time I will, however, do weeks 2-5 of the cleanse. I don't have the funds right now to do everything as it should be done, so as stated above I won't do it until I can do it completely.

Bowel health is very important to me. That being said, I was more comfortable with MC in that I saw "results" daily. With this cleanse I only had results when I chose to drink prune juice as my juice. I am a little nervous that I am going to have to do some extra work to get my bowels back on track. We'll see. I know that he mentions enemas and such in the book for those that have problems with constipation, but I didn't and I don't plan on starting now.

I'm going back to my old chlorophyll. I realize that his chlorophyll might be better, but what good is something that I hate drinking? Maybe as I continue this path I will revisit it, but until then...I'm over it. I also like liquid chlorophyll more than powder...especially grainy powder.

A cleanse shouldn't make you tired imho. Okay, so when I did MC I had the energy of 10 women. I was waking up without my alarm clock, taking walks, and exercising. Well with this I've been too tired to even read my books, which pissed me off a bit.

This is an excellent cleanse for a beginner. The cleanse is short, sweet, and to the point. You also are able to have a break the monotony with the juices and you are also able to choose which juices you want which I love!!!

I realize that my commentary doesn't line up with most that sing the praises of this cleanse and maybe the next time when I am able to do the entire thing I will see a difference. I'm not giving up on it just yet. I'm definitely going to revisit the concepts with my own tweaking. I would suggest that you try this cleanse for yourself and if nothing else buy the book, because it has SO MUCH KNOWLEDGE in it.

Btw, today is the last day of the cleanse, but tomorrow is a recovery day. Don't ever do a liquid cleanse and think that you don't need a recovery day.

The Remedy...Night 1

It's about 9:15pm and I am finishing up my green water. I'm going to go do the breathing exercises prescribed, dry brush my entire body, shower, stretch, and go to bed. This has been a good day and I feel good about it. Btw, my headache is due to my cycle coming and has nothing to do with the cleanse. :)

I meant to mention that a friend of mine started MC today also. I'm very excited for her! It feels really good to see Sistas taking control of their bodies and health. She is going to change her whole family's outlook on health.

It's not about living forever, it's about living out our allotted time to the fullest!

The Remedy Cleanse-Day 1

First of all I started off wrong. lol I was supposed to have my juice in before 9am. Um, yea, I came out of the room at 10:46am. Now that we've had "true confessions" we can cover what has happened so far. I juiced an entire bag of oranges. 24oz for my husband and myself and about 16oz for my dawta. I added 1tbsp my husband's and mine and 1/2 tsp to my dawtas. The reason that I reduced the amount for my dawta is that she doesn't eat as much as we do so I knew she wouldn't drink as much juice. I didn't know what they Supa Mega Green tasted like at that point so I didn't want to overwhelm her. After that I put 2 tbsp each in our gallon jugs of distilled water. Mari drinks 48oz of water per day so I gave her another 1/2 tbsp in her water.
How does it taste in the juice?
Well with the orange juice it didn't alter that taste. I chose orange juice because it was cheaper. The book does give other juices that you can drink on day 1.

How does it taste in the water?
Green. It doesn't taste like grass or anything. It does have a little ginger added for flavor. I would describe it as clean and green tasting.

What if I can't drink that much water?
Even if you normally wouldn't drink a gallon, you will be able to do it on this cleanse. Remember you aren't eating anything solid for 4 days. A gallon per day of water, green or not, should be your goal anyway. Your body is made up of mostly water when in top condition so you have to replenish that. Also drinking water will help you to lose weight if that is one of your goals.

Why should I do instead of MC in your opinion?
I am only on day one, but I will offer an opinion on this anyway. This cleanse is much more "doable" with a more balanced approach. If you are in an emergency situation, like I was when I did MC, I'd have to admit that it looks to be a much faster flushing option. You may even consider following your 10 days on MC with 5 days of The Remedy. The Remedy offers more variation because of the choice of juices. I also grew tired of the sweet taste of the "lemonade" all day.

That's all I have for right now. Let me know if you have any questions and I will do my best to answer them.

Here we go again!

Okay, so I'm going vegan...again. I realize that at this point you think I'm a failure, but I don't even care. This is about my health. Let me start with a cleansing list of my weaknesses:

1. I am addicted to sugar, but not in the form of desserts. I love love love starch! According to Supa Nova Slom I'm a starchetarian.
2. I eat emotionally. I like right now I'm mad as hell and I want a pastry. I'm more pissed off because my husband was supposed to get it hours ago, didn't, and then came out asking about it like I said it 5 minutes ago.
3. I have a major issue with over eating or gluttony. I think it's directly connected to #2.

I will probably add somethings to this list later, but this is all I can think of. So, as you know, I always cleanse with the coming of spring. Well I was going to do the cleanse "The Remedy" by Supa Nova Slom, but the Supa Mega Greens are very slow coming IMHO and he hasn't answered my email enquiring about when it should be here. *just messaged him on FB. Ironically, he'd just made a post about ordering the Mega Greens* Anyway, if they aren't here then I will default to the MC. I really hate doing it and won't even attempt the salt water if I am forced to do it, but I like to cleanse WITH the equinox not before or after. I have to get rid of this stomach. I also have to buy some pepper spray so I can begin walking 3 miles again. Soul Twin doesn't feel too good about me walking alone, but that's why I like it because I'm ALONE! I'm also planning on taking 3 yoga classes a week. We'll see how it goes...Well, this was more of an update than a full post, but of course you will be hearing more from me soon.

Day 10-Starting off well...

Here I am. Day 10. I'm happy, but I am still dreading the last laxative tea during this fast. I am so excited to be able to buy my orange juice today! Yay!!! I am also looking forward to the delicious soup that I will be having on day 12! The recipe for the soup is in the Master Cleanse Book or PDF. Of course I will be adding some things and leaving some things out as needed. I am proud of myself regardless of how hard it was. I know it was good for my body. I will continue to do it for 10 days until I master 10 days and then I will go from there, but no need to worry about that. I am here. I am now. Day 10!!!

Day 9-Punk Wins---No sucha thang!

Iya Ajoke told me that there is no such thing as a punk win. It was cute at the time, but dammit now I understand! Here I am on day 9 and I am having a stand off with the freakin' sh!+ tea a.k.a. "Get Regular Tea". I would love to tell this tea where to go but alas I already dwell in the 7th circle of hell and don't want the tea to follow me!!!

I started off all serene this morning. I was all "divine feminine" and "one with the universe" and then my 7am client was late. GGGGRRRRRR!!!! I HATE WHEN PEOPLE ARE LATE! She said that she said 7ish. I missed that when we scheduled because I have to give permission for "ish" appointments. I let it ride and she said she would be here by 7:30. She was 3 minutes late for the 7:30, which would have been fine except that she was already late for the 7am. So that I am clear "ish" means that you are going to be a little late, 15 minutes max, 30 minutes meant that I could have stayed in the bed. I conveyed my feelings about my pet peeve being conjured and she told me the real story behind what was going on with her which, of course, I will not divulge.

Needless to say her story brought me back to earth because she is in a worse situation that I am and that quickly brought me back into focus. I will still say that day 9 is a beast. Day 10 will be like those little girls who stand there bouncing back and forth in front of the double dutch rope waiting to jump in. Day 11 is going to be a big ol' orange juice whosaaaaaa, Day 12 is gonna be a party!!!

Day 7-Sorry, I've been slack

Well, here I sit on day seven starting to feel my bratty-ness rearing it's head. Toward the end last time I didn't want to drink any of the lemonade at all. I got to the point that I just didn't want to be bothered with it and simply chose hunger. Spoiled right? Well, I am fighting against that now. I think I'm just bored. I love variety and this isn't getting it. Lemon and lime taste the same at this point and I don't care for either one. *chugs "lemonade" out of guilt*
I have to admit, however, that I feel fine physically. As a matter of fact I feel wonderful. All of my weird cravings are gone, though I can't wait to make vegan something with quinoa! OMG!!! I swear it is calling my name. Huh? Oh, I thought I hear something. Anyway, I just have 3 more days of , ugh, lemonade, then 2 more days of orange juice (maybe), and then 2 days of the recommended soup. No problem. Dang that soup sounds good right now. *salivating*
Okay so that's all for now. This is all about discipline and iwa pele and I am going to maintain both until the end. Ase.

Day 4-Headaches, soup, Master Cleanse PDF

I've had a headache today. Well, the headache isn't as bad as it was the last time, but it's here and has been here all day. I am able to deal with it because I am accustomed to full blown migraines. You have to count the little blessing I guess. I had enough energy to help paint my daughters room and do 2 clients so I am really happy about that.

Titus decided to come off of the cleanse a little early (sssshhhh don't tell him that I told you.) He did his day of orange juice today. I had to prepare his soup for tomorrow. I must admit that it was not made with love AT ALL!!! Nothing like cooking food when you can't even lick your fingers! The soup was so simple that he could have made it himself, but I make all the made-from-scratch-healthy-vegan-meals. I was really mad.

Last but not least. I sent my husband and others the MC PDF a long time ago before the fast began. He, like many people, didn't read it. He skimmed it tonight and learned a lot just from skimming. I cannot not emphasize this enough. READ THE PDF IN FULL!!!! This is a cleanse that needs to be done right or not at all.

Day 3-UGH!

So yea...I woke up at 4 am. I mean wide awake. I said my prayers and such to prepare for my day. I went to the living room to drink my tea and watch Mandingo for the first time (OMG! That movie pissed me off! You gotta see it.) Around 6:30 my body remembered that we don't wake up at 4am and started to get sleepy, but I couldn't go to sleep because my niece and nephew were set to arrive at 7am. I am really tired, but I know that it will get better. I really wish that I had more time to lay down and really rest. Because Mr. Broom and I are doing the cleanse together it is really hard to just rest and relax because he doesn't know how to mix the lemonade. Usually because I mix it I also get his and mine. This has caused me to be a bit irritable. I have learned that I need to start the cleanse before he does the next time so that I can be into the good part by the time he starts.

I don't know if I mentioned this in the beginning, but I know I mentioned it the first time I did Master Cleanse because I read it on somebody else's blog. WARNING: If you are on MC please don't EVER assume that you just have gas. Your poop has been transformed to a liquid state that all the clenching in the world can't hold back. You WILL mess up your underwear if you assume you have gas. Now, because of this warning I have NEVER had a mishap, so consider yourself warned!


I really hope that you are able to try this cleanse and make it the entire journey. It is rewarding it two ways. You will feel a sense of achievement and you body will feel so much better!

The tea vs.The saltwater

First let me say that the right way to do the MC is to drink the saltwater in the morning. If you are truly unable to do this you are allowed to drink the laxative tea both morning and night. That being said there is a definite difference in the results and the speed at which you see results.

Saltwater-You will see/have almost immediate profound results. Once you have had said results you are pretty much done with bowel movements for the day in my experience.You are free to go where ever you like without having to preplanned the fastest routes to the cleanest restrooms.

Laxative tea-It takes longer to take affect. This is day two for me and I am just starting to have results that are the result of the tea. Btw, you will know if it is your regular poo or MC poo because the MC poo is more loose, a different color, and will have that cayenne tingle. lol If you are doing the tea morning and night I would suggest, as mentioned above, that you plot your routes according to clean accessible bathrooms if you plan on going out. After all you never know when it will kick in in the beginning.

I really hope this helps somebody. You can do this!

Day 2

Well, it's day two. Today, I am sore from my projectile vomiting yesterday. lol Other than that everything is fine. I still wish that I could tolerate the saltwater because it works so much better than the tea. :( I have to go to the homeschool co-op today so I'm hoping that I don't have any bowel issues. See, with the saltwater the bowel movements are much more predictable than with the tea and in actuality it makes it much easier. Mr. Broom did drink all of the saltwater and had excellent results.

The only thing that I messed up with is that I didn't drink enough lemonade before my tea last night and so I was really hungry. I just went to sleep.

Tomorrow is the day that my clients/friends will start the cleanse so hopefully since I will be on day 3 I will be of some assistance. I hope they call me for help because that actually helps me to cope a little better. Helping others helps the helper.

Day 1 Epic Fail

Yea so, the salt water? No go. It was worse than before. I don't know if it is mental or physical for me. At first I just couldn't get a decent amount of it down, then came the juicy mouth. You know how your mouth gets a drooly like a teething baby? Then you get the heevies? Yea. Running to the trashcan at 5:30ish in the morning just ain't cool. I learned something about myself though. I don't like to be alone and throwing up. It's really weird, because that's what I was thinking about the whole time--being alone and throwing up. Yes, the salt water tasted even worse coming back out, but all I could think about was being alone. Weird right? I just kept thinking, "Where is Titus?", but for once he wasn't there. :( The sadness was very strange. I've decided to go with prune juice although technically that isn't an option. I will probably chase it with tea and then on to the "lemonade". I'll let you all know how everything goes from there. So far, however, EPIC FAIL. I am just keeping in mind that throwing up is not the same as giving up. ;)